Growing up, I had a TV in my room. Whenever I wanted to feel less alone, it would be TV and film that I turned to, sometimes watching intently and sometimes allowing it to play in the background while I played with my Barbie dolls. It’s only been in the last few years that I’ve really fallen in love with music and the way it inspires and connects people. It probably started in lockdown when I printed out the lyrics of Hozier’s ‘In a Week’ and annotated them, enamored with the enchantment of the words and the ability to manipulate them perfectly. Lyricism is a special form of magic that eludes me entirely.
In particular, the experience of live music enthralls me and I’m so grateful to have been able to see some of my favourite artists live and hear them sing the lyrics I’ve fallen in love with.
Florence + The Machine, November 2022
Florence Welch has been one of my favourite artists for a long time. Her book ‘Useless Magic’ sits on my bookshelf, pages worn from flicking through it so often in search of something to believe in. Her music is comforting and confronting simultaneously, drawing out feelings I didn’t know I possessed, pulling blood from my body in the form of tears.
£40 tickets and the penultimate row of the O2 arena led to one of my favourite nights ever. We travelled into London, picking out cocktail tins that matched our outfits (mine was a pink gin) and giggling on the tube with baby bottles of prosecco. We found our seats early, revising the lyrics and making a last-minute dash to the merch stand. The poster still hangs above my bed two years later, even with the creases I gave it from dancing too hard in my seat. The infamous show where Flo broke her foot from dancing too hard. I cried tears of joy and awe, enchanted by one of my favourite artists standing in front of me, even if it was from far away. Sharing that night with my best friends was so special and it was a year later when I got the words ‘dance fever’ tattooed on my arm in her honour.
I never knew my killer would be coming from within
Harry Styles, June 2023
I got lucky for this concert and ended up in the back pitch, so close I could see Harry’s smile as it was mirrored on my own face. The sun beat down on us for hours while we huddled under the barrier waiting for it to set, associating the dwindling light with the beginning of the night and Harry’s approach. Wet Leg opened and it was incredible, but when Harry took the stage, my skin was alight with excitement. The magic that lies in his concerts is the sense of community and friendship; the sea of feather boas in the stadium and the stray feathers that adorned the concrete of the surroundings of the stadium like glitter sparkling on the dreary canvas of London. It’s a spellbinding experience that is so hard to encapsulate and I wish I had been able to bottle it up for when I need to feel alive again. Instead, I’ll spend my life chasing it through the videos and photos I took.
As a brunette bookworm who grew up reading and watching ‘Matilda’ and feeling a little like her, hearing Harry sing ‘Matilda’, along with the whole of Wembley Stadium, was incredible. As my peers and I turn from broken little clay figures to ceramicists of our own, moulding our lives to look just how we dreamed about as kids, hearing the lyrics sung by thousands of people was so so special and I will forever remember the heart balloon soaring above us as we sang together, watching it drift away along with our childhood dreams.
You can start a family who will always show you love
You don't have to be sorry for doing it on your own
Stevie Nicks, July 2024
Stevie Nicks is pure magic and seeing her in Hyde Park was incredible. I went with one of my oldest friends and the fact that after all of our years together we made it to be sat in (accidentally) matching outfits waiting for Stevie to take the stage was a moment I’ll never forget. We may have had to sit on the grass for hours and firmly defend our spot on the damp ground, but when Stevie took to the stage the park just lit up. I couldn’t help but watch these two older women in front of us, who were friends in matching outfits, and I hope that when we get older and our faces show the history of our lives, my friend and I will still be attending concerts together and telling strangers our stories.
(Special mentions for Paris Palmona and Anna Calvi who were incredible and inspired me beyond words)
Stevie herself was pure magic, telling us anecdotes about how she misses the stage of her life where she was young and struggling. That story made it a lot easier to appreciate that that’s where I am right now. One day I too will be 76 years old and reminiscing on the start of my life where anything was possible and everything was magical.
As if Stevie weren’t enough, we were surprised to see Harry Styles take the stage to accompany her for two songs; ‘Stop Draggin’ My Heart Around’ and the beautiful ‘Landslide’. By this point the sun had set and the concert was ever more intimate, wrapped in the darkness that allowed us to feel more vulnerable. Tears were flowing and the crowd did not skip a beat in singing along with Stevie, helping her close out the concert with perhaps the hardest song for her to perform, with the backdrop of her friendship with Christine McVie told through a slideshow of photos that broke my heart.
But time makes you bolder
Even children get older
And I'm gettin' older, too
Hearing Stevie Nicks sing such powerful lyrics with her incredible voice on a grey summer evening in London has honestly changed my life. I’m writing this now while watching the videos and even now, my skin is sprinkled with goosebumps. I first heard Fleetwood Mac’s music in American Horror Story: Coven, and I was instantly drawn in. Their music was a brief respite from the messiness of being a 16-year-old girl and when their music played in my headphones, the bees in my skull were docile. For years now, Stevie Nicks and the music of Fleetwood Mac have helped me when I’m anxious, their music being the only kind capable of untying the knot in my stomach and comforting me like nothing else, and hearing it live was perfect.
While live music is an event in itself, listening to music has a way of making the mundane sparkle and turning moments of emptiness into pockets of magic, and I have so many songs that mean something to me because of the moment I shared with them.
If you watch Grey’s Anatomy you’ll be familiar with this. Meredith and Cristina ‘dance it out’ to ‘Where Does the Good Go’, and my friends and I employed this tactic at university. I remember a specific occasion, stood in the dingy hallway of our student house, our sock-covered feet thumping on the brown carpet while we sang our lungs out to this song. I’ve spent the last year apart from my best friends due to studying abroad, and every time the world feels a little too scary, I listen to this song and I’m no longer alone.
I don’t often see myself in TV characters, as much as I wish I could relate to my favourite protagonists. Music, though, is different. It’s exposing in its familiarity, as if words have been stolen from my own journal to stitch together the songs that accompany me throughout my day. It’s complete power and I wish I possessed some of it, but for now, my words are muted, unembellished with the song that turns poetry to magic. I’m a silent observer, stewing my words until they one day evoke the emotions my favourite artists can manifest.
this is so beautifully written !!!!
The way you paint pictures with your writing is just stunning. I can’t wait to read more from you Freya!