So relatable! It took me time before finding my people. In school, I was nothing more but a stand-in. It’s only a few years ago, when I started meeting people outside of Uni I realised friends could come from everywhere. Like you, I’ve always heard that I’d find my best-friends in secondary school, then high-school, and university. Never happened and when friends tell me about their besties they know since kindergarten, I’m like "ouch, that hurts". I’m still at the stage I’m wondering if people are really hanging with me because they like me, but on the other hand if they are here, it’s for a reason. Also, I think what defines our relationships with others is our relationship with ourselves. It’s only after learning about self-love, accepting and loving to be by myself I understood I was a better friend this way, because I’m not scared anymore of what could happen. And I enjoy every moment of my "real" friendships (not the people I’m stuck with all day at uni) because if they didn’t love me, they won’t be by my side. I understand that now, even if they are still doubts deep inside myself sometimes
Freya, we are 10 years apart and I find so much wisdom and resonation in your words. Coincidentally I’ve been doing a GG rewatch lately and find myself longing for a friendship that can handle fights and still find it’s way back to loyalty. Which makes me laugh bc I wouldn’t say Blair and Serena are the pinnacle friendship, maybe more Chuck and Nate, but they have love in their dysfunctional friendship.
This is such a lovely comment, thank you! 🫶🏻 it’s trued Blair and Serena’s loyalty is something special, but probably the only part of their relationship I’d want hahahaa
Female friendships, especially in teen years, can be sooo confusing. I had a friend mid-teens and I only found out years after that she hated my guts the entire time, but she kept me close? GIRL, so confusing 🙄
thank you for your article. i’ve had a lot of toxic relationships with women as a queer non-binary because sometimes romantic feelings get in the way, one way or another. but i’m lucky enough to say that through time and space i’ve met people who support me, that i support back, and love spending time with them even if that’s 8hs a day every day, i can’t get enough of them and their ideas and their opinions and that’s the beauty of friendship as i’ve come to realize
I think about female friendship and its nuances way more than is considered healthy. Also been though a couple of really rough friendship breakups that had me reeling for a good couple of years... Your essay spoke to my heart and soul.
okay it's funny that I've also been watching gossip girl and listening to the girl so confusing remix. I also had a best friend in school and we were inseparable, then we parted ways and it does feel a bit awkward. I don't know what it is about female friendships sometimes, it's all so confusing. (but this is beautifully written)
So relatable! It took me time before finding my people. In school, I was nothing more but a stand-in. It’s only a few years ago, when I started meeting people outside of Uni I realised friends could come from everywhere. Like you, I’ve always heard that I’d find my best-friends in secondary school, then high-school, and university. Never happened and when friends tell me about their besties they know since kindergarten, I’m like "ouch, that hurts". I’m still at the stage I’m wondering if people are really hanging with me because they like me, but on the other hand if they are here, it’s for a reason. Also, I think what defines our relationships with others is our relationship with ourselves. It’s only after learning about self-love, accepting and loving to be by myself I understood I was a better friend this way, because I’m not scared anymore of what could happen. And I enjoy every moment of my "real" friendships (not the people I’m stuck with all day at uni) because if they didn’t love me, they won’t be by my side. I understand that now, even if they are still doubts deep inside myself sometimes
Oh gosh this is so relatable, and you’re right. They wouldn’t be there if they didn’t love you <3
Freya, we are 10 years apart and I find so much wisdom and resonation in your words. Coincidentally I’ve been doing a GG rewatch lately and find myself longing for a friendship that can handle fights and still find it’s way back to loyalty. Which makes me laugh bc I wouldn’t say Blair and Serena are the pinnacle friendship, maybe more Chuck and Nate, but they have love in their dysfunctional friendship.
You’re gonna find that love, I’m sure of it 🫶🏼
This is such a lovely comment, thank you! 🫶🏻 it’s trued Blair and Serena’s loyalty is something special, but probably the only part of their relationship I’d want hahahaa
Female friendships, especially in teen years, can be sooo confusing. I had a friend mid-teens and I only found out years after that she hated my guts the entire time, but she kept me close? GIRL, so confusing 🙄
FOR REAL such a strange phenomenon
This is beautiful.
Thank you! <3
This was beautiful. Thank you for sharing it.
Thank you so much!!
thank you for your article. i’ve had a lot of toxic relationships with women as a queer non-binary because sometimes romantic feelings get in the way, one way or another. but i’m lucky enough to say that through time and space i’ve met people who support me, that i support back, and love spending time with them even if that’s 8hs a day every day, i can’t get enough of them and their ideas and their opinions and that’s the beauty of friendship as i’ve come to realize
I’m so glad you’re finding good friendships <3
Ooh I love this SO MUCH!!!!
I think about female friendship and its nuances way more than is considered healthy. Also been though a couple of really rough friendship breakups that had me reeling for a good couple of years... Your essay spoke to my heart and soul.
Thank you for writing it 🥰
such a relatable read! girl friendships can be so so confusing sometimes but also so lovely, i feel like you captured this so well <3
I couldn’t relate more to this 🥲❤️
okay it's funny that I've also been watching gossip girl and listening to the girl so confusing remix. I also had a best friend in school and we were inseparable, then we parted ways and it does feel a bit awkward. I don't know what it is about female friendships sometimes, it's all so confusing. (but this is beautifully written)
Omg twins!!! I’m so glad you relate and thank you so much 🫶🏻
🫶🏼
love!!